I’m in a better mood today. I’m on the verge of saying that I feel good. Maybe the Pristiq is starting to work. Or maybe, I just haven’t been triggered in the last few hours. It is a bit strange, though. As I was walking home from 7-Eleven with my Gatorade and Marlboro Lights, I recognized that I was actually feeling ok.
The weird bit is that I still want to die.
I’m really curious if I’m going to shake that or not. I mean, if I’m feeling a bit better, shouldn’t that include me no longer wanting to kill myself? If it doesn’t, what the hell am I supposed to do? Die, I guess.
I just e-mailed my ex-wife to try to set up a ‘meet and greet’ between my daughter and my new dog tomorrow morning. I hope she’s on board with it and is willing to put her dislike of me to the side, so we can do what’s best for my little girl. I’ve got to walk the dog now, but I think I’ll talk a little bit more later about my daughter and my dog.