My first, of several, packages of hard drugs arrived yesterday: a gram of crystal meth. This was the first time I ever used this drug and, being the good junkie that I am, I reached right for the needle. Now, I didn’t want to fuck myself, so I did a little research and found that right around 0.1g is a good starting point for newbies shooting meth.
2pm: I push. I felt nothing. No rush. No warmth. Now, I know I’m used to heroin, but I must be doing something wrong. I immediately set up another 0.15g and pushed again. I got a little rush this time. Of course, the quarter gram I had at this point was starting to get my system racing. To be honest, those first two hits were a bit slow to ramp up. With my new found energy, I attacked my afternoon work with an uncommon vigor. Around 5pm, I really want to use again… not because my energy is low, but because I want to see what shooting a full 0.25g feels like. I hold off for a bit.
6pm: I push. Holy shit. I felt it fucking this time… a fucking electric shock to the heart and the loveliest burnt metal feeling in the back of my mouth and throat. Now, it wasn’t dope, but I wouldn’t mind doing this once in a while. At this point I realized that I wasn’t sleeping that night. I was go, go, go. Writing, talking on the phone, TV (porn), masturbation (again, porn). Actually, the masturbation was a bit tricky. It turns out there is a thing called ‘Crystal Dick’. Basically, all your blood is moving around your body so fast, that your penis gets shortchanged and it becomes difficult to get and maintain an erection. The plan was to do my next push with a junkie friend in NC around midnight. We wound up running a bit late.
12.30am: I’m ready to push… blood registered, plunger ready to go… but my friend is having trouble finding a vein. For ten minutes I stand there, needle in the vein, waiting. Finally, she gets tired of making me wait and tells me to go ahead and push. Again, a repeat of the previous one. Oh, that taste in my mouth is gorgeous. She finally finds a vein a couple minutes later and joins me. For the next three hours, I’m very busy writing, chatting online and talking on the phone. My plan is to use my last quarter gram at 5am. However, my junkie friend calls me back at around 3am and I allow myself to become persuaded to shoot immediately. I evidently was a bit light on my previous shots, because this one comes out to an even 300mg. Great! Game on!
3.30am: Final push. Wow. The extra 50mg is definitely noticeable. It’s not going to replace dope, but a gram of this every now and then might just hit the spot. Now, it’s time to ride this chemically induced hyper alertness as far as it will take me…
7.30pm: I’m now going on about 40 hours without sleep and I still feel sharp as a tack. I had no problems working or having my therapy session or anything. All afternoon, I was having sort of tactile flashbacks of that metallic taste in my mouth and I’m eating it up. I am wondering if I’ll be able to sleep at all tonight also. I guess we’ll just have to wait and see. I am a little concerned that my hits were so large, given this was my first time doing this. I know I’m stressing my heart (and probably other organs as well). When I got ready to shoot the 300mg, I wondered how much would you have to do to OD? A single shot at 500mg? 1g over the course of 12 hours (what I just did)? I don’t know. It just means I have to do more research if I decide to use meth again.