I started falling into a depression about two weeks ago and I am deep in it now. I’ve been unable to work, barely able to write, forcing myself to eat, etc. Now, in the last 48 hours, the suicidal ideation has started up again. I sit in the car, praying to be involved in a fatal accident. That’s probably not going to happen. A gram of heroin is probably plenty to overdose on. Shit, I haven’t used in two months. Half that much would probably do the job. I don’t have any immediate plans to do that, but it’s nice to have that plan in my back pocket.

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