So, as my rational mind suspected last night, my reaction to what was N falling asleep was completely overblown.  I knew it was.  I knew it.  But I got (and get) so emotionally worked up that I just completely lose my shit.  Fuck BPD.

But more about N.  We just had a fairly intense texting exchange.  Here’s a highlight:

Anorexic Junkie: I love you… a lot.  I want you in my life, long-term, however that may wind up looking like.  I suspect that you feel similarly.  Am I close?

N: Yes.  Absolutely.

I can’t speak for her, but I think I may be in love for the first time in a very, very long time.