Perks of Being a Wallflower (and Other Miscellaneous Shit)

I just put the film on. It has some of my top male and female celebrity crushes: Ezra Miller and Emma Watson.

And I really identify with the protagonist (played by Logan Lerman) as well. An introverted, mentally ill high school geek? Yeah, funny I should relate to that at all. I have never not cried at the end of this film. I won’t give any spoilers. Just try to watch it, when you get the chance.

I told my Refuge Recovery mentor about my letter to N. He said he was in a similar situation with someone he evidently wasn’t very nice to before he came into recovery. We’re sitting down before tomorrow night’s meeting to discuss our respective situations and, possibly, figure out a way forward that will do the least damage to our former friends.

I talked about my compulsive exercise at my Eating Disorders Anonymous meeting. I was mostly honest. I am concerned about losing control. I’m on a slippery slope and I know it. I started running again just a little over two weeks ago. Yesterday, I ran nearly 7 miles, over a mountain, through a driving rain, to get to a meeting. Tomorrow, I’m running over 9 miles to a meeting. I didn’t mention that in the meeting today. I am eating a little better, forced by my increased physical activity, but just a little. I ate 4 times today and puked twice. I’m not back down to the low weight I hit last week, but I seem to be continuing a slow but steady decrease in weight (which I’m mostly ok with at this point).

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