On the car ride home from a Refuge Recovery meeting this morning, one of my friend’s started to talk about her own moderate cannabis use. Needless to say, this got my attention. We were with my mentor (J) and his S.O. (S) who were evidently aware of her use already. I still haven’t told them about my own use. I did take advantage of some alone time with my weed-smoking friend to inform her that I was on a similar path and have been working through, with my therapist, some of the same concerns that she was voicing in the car.
I just messaged her with a little more detail. I didn’t mention using anything other than cannabis in the message but I did leave the door open, in how I wrote, for questions about what else I might be using. We’ll see. I was encouraged that J & S were accepting of her use and motivates me more to bring them into the loop on what I’m doing. In fact, of the three of us in the house, only A is super concerned about being ‘outed’ and I respect that.
I was able to help her find the gray a little more in her own use and she knows she has someone she can talk to about what she’s doing, if she wants to. I still find it a bit odd to be using substances as part of my recovery but it seems that a lot of people actually do use some things still. She and I both agreed that 100% abstinence is probably the ideal solution. We also acknowledge our own difficulties in achieving that and try not to shame ourselves too much about what we are doing.