Black and White Thinking

Ok. So, I had intended to never post here again and talk exclusively about recovery on the YouTube channel I just started (YouTube: Borderline Bloke). This was once again a case of black and white thinking… something that I have a LOT of trouble with. In fact, this week’s episode on YouTube is going to […]

Thank You For Following This Blog

I started this blog almost 4 years ago and, arguably, captured myself at my sickest during that time. I used this blog to blow of steam and talk about things that I could talk about with no one else. I did this anonymously, for fear of retribution IRL. In August of last year, I started […]

Fear (TW – Drugs)

Another marker of BPD is finding fear, well, everywhere. I know I go through life scared of just about everything I could be scared of. I always think I’m about to be fired. A delayed response to a text means I’m now despised by my BFF. There are no emotionally neutral faces… only angry ones. […]

Too Much Love

One of the hallmarks of borderline personality disorder is experiencing incredibly intense emotions and having to wait a long time for those emotions to dissipate. Most of the time, those emotions are what you would expect them to be: anxiety, fear, depression, etc. For the last few days, I’ve been suffering (yes, suffering) from an […]

Insanity

I began journaling on April 16th, 2017 and am on to my third journal at this point. The first journal wraps up as I left New Jersey, just before Labor Day of 2017. The second journal picks up with my arrival in Utah and tracks through the end of August 2018 (the last entry actually […]

Stigma and Anonymity

I mentioned yesterday that the woman in charge of the ‘Beirut in Portland’ project had completed editing my interview about the stigma associated with my mental health issues. I had a lengthy discussion with my therapist about what to do now and have e-mailed the woman to discuss where to go from here. In the […]